It is a beautiful thing when you find someone that your heart warms up to, someone compatible, understanding loving, caring, kind and compassionate. Keeping such relationships is generally advisable because it is not the kind you find easily; for this reason, I came up with 10 (ten) relationship advice that can help sustain any relationship……..

1.      NEVER START A RELATIONSHIP WITH LIES: Lies kills trust in relationships. Once trust is missing in a relationship, such relationship is the case of a sinking ship. The problem with relationships based on lie is that the defaulting partner will always tell more lies to cover up former ones. From experience, relationship based of lies and deceit do not last because most defaulting partners do not have the courage to admit the truth to their partners.

2.     KEEP IT REAL: I realize that most relationships are based on fairy tales or the experience and testimonies of others. I believe it is wrong to use other people’s relationship as a yardstick for yours. It is important to know that every relationship is unique in its own way. Keep your relationship real. Make it unique.

3.     ACCEPT EACH OTHER’S DIFFERENCES: I have this opinion that there is no perfect person on earth; every perfect person is imperfect to another. One of the reasons the world is an interesting place and has continually evolved and developed is because people do not behave the same way…. Imagine if everyone on earth behaves the same way, the world would be messy. In relationships we need to learn to accept people the way they are. If the way they are is unethical, we can gradually try to make them see reasons to change. Never force anyone to change. It would only bring bad blood to the relationship.

4.     COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR PATNER: One of the major reasons relationship ends up in wrecking ball is usually because there lack of communication. Communication is an important factor in whatever relationship we keep. Every relationship no matter how perfect have bad days, but a healthy communication helps couple overcome bad days and obstacles in relationships.

5.     ADDRESS EVERY ISSUES IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITHIN A SHORT TIME: Fights are bound to happen in every relationship. What makes our relationship stronger is the power to look pass our anger and address issues as soon as possible. This avoids allowing very trivial issues aggravate into something serious. When settling issues amongst couple that you find out that most of the time, they do not remember what started their fight because they fail to address the issues within time.

6.     LEARN TO APOLOGIZE: Apology have saved a lot of relationship and has also destroy a lot. Apology goes a long way to address issues. Do not be too proud or egoistic to apologise to your spouse or partner. Learn to accept your mistakes and show remorse for them. When we are doing this, we should make sure it is sincere and not just because we want the other person to get off our back.

7.     DO NOT TAKE YOUR PARTNER FOR GRANTED: Some people argue that once there is love in a relationship, your partner cannot take you for granted. Yes this is right. But we should also have it in mind that some people naturally are nonchalant about things generally. The spouse or a partner of a nonchalant person may often feel that he/she is being taken for granted. People like this should make extra effort to see that they are less nonchalant about their relationships.

8.     RESPECT EACH OTHER: No matter how familiar you are with your spouse or partner, there should be respect between both parties. Respect should be mutual and not coming from one side of the relationship. Mutual respect is essential in maintaining healthy relationships. 

9.     BUILD TRUST IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP: If you want a lasting relationship, you need to build the trust in your relationship to the extent that your spouse feels confident and safe with you emotional and physically. The major step of building trust is to be an opened book. Do not be secretive or manipulative. The most satisfying the relationship are built on trust.

10.                        IT TAKES MORE THAN LOVE TO KEEP A RELATIONSHIP: I know this would come as a shock to most of my readers. Some might even have a counter argument (I am opened to constructive criticisms and argument). Love is the beginning of every relationship. When you love someone, you care for them, you respect them, you accept them, you endure etc. it is true that love is the back bone of every relationship but in some cases, both partners or spouses will have to put extra effort and work towards achieving a satisfying relationship. For example, the ability to discern in your relationship is key; when to give little distance, when to come closer, when to encourage, when to talk, when not to talk, when to cry with, when to scold, when to comfort, when to be romantic etc. Knowing and understanding time take extra effort from both parties.

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